So this is my second entry. In case someone other than me is reading this, you might like to know that I won't always just be talking randomly. I'll probably share lots of other stuff too. Like cupcakes and cakes that I've made and pictures that I've drawn. But until then we're stuck with my random ramblings. The things that are taking up a lot of space in my head are probably mostly concerning my future plans and maybe some mean thoughts, angry thoughts about our current house guests. The one I love dearly, after all she is my flesh and blood and I love having her around more but come on! The others make me want to pull my hair out. I guess I can be quite a horrible person sometimes. But anyway, my future plans... I have no idea what to do. At the moment I'm going with the flow, I can't help feeling guilty all the time because I have no responabilities at all. I can literally do whatever the hell I want all day. I don't work and I don't study... I relax and relax and relax. I mean I love it! I wish I could do this all my life but there's that guilty feeling that hangs over my head that will prevent that from happening. I've considered getting a part time job or something but I just can't see myself working like an ass for some horrible company again. I know its not realistic to think this way but I always feel like I'm meant to be doing something bigger with my life. Not like hugely big! I mean I'd frickin' love to help cure cancer and stuff but lets not great crazy now. By big I mean personally big, like writing a great novel or an amazing movie screenplay. I'd love to open up my own little cake shop. But in the mean time I feel like I have to go through the little things first to advance in life. My dad wants me to study, but I seriously don't know what to study. I have a lot of interests but none of them include studying 24/7 and then working 9-5 5 days a week. Maybe I should find a rich husband and I can continue 'relaxing' at home. I love being at home, I swear I don't think I could ever get bored. All I need in life are ingredients to make lovely little cakes and a laptop to write on. I think that is a simple enough need. But how do I expect my dad to understand that? 'Oh dad I don't want to do anything with my life but bake and write.' Ya I don't think he'd like that very much. Sometimes I go around with my head in the clouds thinking how magical my life is and then I start to think about the reality of it and it scares me. I'm not grown up enough yet to think about big life responsabilties and it feels like I never will be. AND I don't want to waste money on a degree that I'll never use, I mean it is a lot of flippin' money to study these days! And there'll be more guilt waiting for me when I don't use the degree or if I happen to fail. Anyway, I'm starving so I'm gonna sign off and write more later. Good day*